Ka-pow!

Honestly, It's funny how alot of American sitcoms' jokes about Canada are basically all about (aboot) how lame we're supposed to be. All I have to say is you guys have 'Dora the Explorer'. We've got 'Nanalan'. Put that in your pipe and smoke it! ssg.x.

Toronto's Eye Magazine seems to have a huge problem with fanfiction. After having Alex point out the first one from last week's issue, I tried finding it to send to brigidforest. I ended up finding a few more.

I'm not sure why fanfiction garners so much of their attention if the writers find it such a waste of time. Ah well - I'm a Now Magazine person, m'self.

http://www.eye.net/eye/issue/issue_02.08.07/arts/books.php
http://www.eyeweekly.com/eye/issue/issue_02.01.01/news/newmedia.php
http://www.eyeweekly.com/eye/issue/issue_03.29.01/news/newmedia.php

:)

<3 ssg.x.

I've been looking for this for ages!



YES!

<3
ssg.x.

Okay,

1. Why is 'Friends' on ten fucking times a day?

2. I got engaged.

3. I watched the newest 'Jane Eyre' on Masterpiece Theatre and I quite liked it. There was a lot more kissing in this version than in any other and I thought that would bother me but it didn't. Many liberties have been taken with the dialogue but overall I thought it was great. A few people have posted the entire thing on youtube if you're interested in watching it. Or you can wait until it comes out on DVD February 27th.

I'm almost positive everyone's seen OK GO but on the offchance you haven't seen them on treadmills yet, here's your chance.



<3
ssg.x.

Saw Stranger Than Fiction last night and it was fantastic. Really. F.A.N.T.A.S.T.I.C.

I was struck by their use of Wreckless Eric's 'Whole Wide World'. It's one of my favourite songs and whenever it shows up in a movie (I think the last movie I heard it in was 'Me Without You') it always sort of surprises me because it's one of those cult songs that doesn't get much radio airplay. I end up feeling a sort of kinship with the film makers after that because they hear the same thing in it that I probably hear.

Every time I hear it I think about my sister's long-time boyfriend/friend/whatever saying that everyone on the planet has one really good song in them and that 'Whole Wide World' is a perfect example of that. Two chords, simple, silly lyrics and it's still just awesome.

Wreckless Eric - Whole Wide World


I wonder what my song is and when the crap it's going to come out of hiding.

Speaking of...

It's going to be a song because I've already ruled out that it ain't gonna be a poem.

I had to go to these workshops today for our professional development day. One of them was about using visual literacy and post modern art themes in the classroom. One of the activities involved us looking through the illustrations of various pieces of literature. My group got 'The Jabberwocky' by Lewis Carroll from a new series of classic poetry and prose put out by Kids Can Press. Each poem published is accompanied by these amazing post modern illustrations.



Each person in the group had to choose five words to describe their descriptive feelings about the artwork then drop them in an envelope. We each choose five words from the bunch in the envelope and write a short poem using them.

I got stuck with five crap words that had very little to do with the illustrations.

Damp
Foggy
Quiet
Chilling
Macabre

Okay, I agree with 'macabre' and 'chilling'. I'm not sure where the crap 'damp', 'foggy' or 'quiet' came from. Apparently dampness is in the eye of the beholder.

So we had five minutes to write a poem and I haven't written a poem since grade ten (awful, awful poetry). This is the best I could come up with. I call it 'It's Not My Fault -- I Only Had Five Minutes And Didn't Sleep Well Last Night'.


It's Not My Fault -- I Only Had Five Minutes And Didn't Sleep Well Last Night

Quiet suspicions,
Damp sheets,
Foggy alibis

Fists curl,
Shapes shift,
Into chilling macabre



Probably shouldn't quit my day job. :D

<3
ssg.x.

Who Should Paint You: Andy Warhol

You've got an interesting edge that would be reflected in any portrait You don't need any fancy paint techniques to stand out from the crowd!

<3
ssg.x.

So The Trailerpark Boys movie is out and it's going to be awesome (or, as the tagline suggests: "way more awesomer") no matter what (Bubbles can do no wrong).

Ivan Reitman is the executive producer though, and I've been reading up on what a dickhead he was during the entire filming process.

The film was originally supposed to be titled "Trailerpark Boys: The Big Dirty" but Mr. Reitman insisted it should be called "Trailerpark Boys: The Movie". Wow. Genius. What a fucking shithawk (I finally know what one looks like in real life). Also, since the movie is rated r (mostly for the potty mouth) Mr. Reitman insisted that there needed to be some nudity in the film. What the fuck?!

Fucking Hollywood. You greedy, stupid shits ruin everything.

...

My LiveJournal Trick-or-Treat Haul
sidewalksg goes trick-or-treating, dressed up as Phyllis Diller.
authenticpoppy gives you 6 pink licorice-flavoured nuggets.
brigidforest gives you 1 red lime-flavoured jawbreakers.
disposable_hero gives you 3 brown licorice-flavoured pieces of bubblegum.
ishotkenney tricks you! You lose 2 pieces of candy!
kajouka gives you 2 white orange-flavoured gummy bats.
kittengrin gives you 3 orange tropical-flavoured gummy bats.
pia_z tricks you! You lose 5 pieces of candy!
twilightfucker tricks you! You get a clothespin.
sidewalksg ends up with 8 pieces of candy, and a clothespin.
Go trick-or-treating! Username:
Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern.

I did some touch-ups on my very first painting and I'm feeling this strange and funny thing called pride. I had to share it. Any thoughts are welcomed. Honestly, I thought my first bout into the world of painting would be horrendous, but I don't think it turned out quite so bad.



Also, I got my police check back yesterday. My suicide attempts are officially my business and mine alone once again (well...and those I choose to share it with). I can't believe it took so damn long to get this shit sorted out.

Slowly but surely...

Two things to mention:

1. I was walking to the children's drop-in today with the baby and a gentleman approached and asked for the time. He was clearly wearing a toupee, but as I looked back at him from checking my watch, I noticed that he'd left the plastic bit of the price tag that once hung from it in. I'm not sure what the proper etiquette for something like this is. I mean, I couldn't very well point it out to him, but then the thought of this poor man getting laughed at until he realized his mistake just broke my heart. I'm losing my sense of humour, or getting old or something. I don't know...

2. A woman at the drop-in randomly asked me if I preferred sex with or without the lights. I answered 'without' with nary a blink of my eyes or a sarcastic remark to follow. I'm not sure what that means about who I'm turning into, either.

There's orange jell-o in the fridge that must be tended to.

<3
ssg.x.

Steve McQueen-- Where He Stood On Cheese:

"Steve was a nutty cat; he loved broads and drinking and drugs; I don't really know where he stood on cheese, though. I like cheese." -- James Coburn

"If you watch Steve really closely in Bullitt, you'll see him eating a sandwich that definitely has cheese on it"--Georg Stanford Brown (Bullitt co-star)

"Whenever Steve was riding his motorcycle up or down the coast, he'd often stop at a restaurant that he liked a lot. He almost always had something with cheese in it" -- James Garner

"I swear to God, I worked with McQueen on like three pictures and we went out for lunch a lot. We'd both get burgers. Steve, well, hell, Steve not only got a cheeseburger-- he'd ask for two slices of cheese! He'd say 'put another slice on there' and he'd hold up his hand like this, with two fingers up." -- Charles Bronson

Every time I find out about something else I had in common with the late Steve McQueen, another piece of my heart falls into darkness.

Sonofabitch.

<3
ssg.x.

So.

I visit with the doctor who's supposed to arrange my flight over the cuckoo's nest. Predictably, the first thing she says to me is:

"I'm not entirely sure I see the point in your going. You already know you're bi-polar."

I explain to her that this is my fucking problem. I've quite possibly been misdiagnosed by one moron meaning that this permanent stamp he put on my forehead a decade ago is going to haunt me for the rest of my natural life.

I also tell her I want to go back on medication. She says "Oh, good. You should definitely be on medication."

Hmm.

"No doubt lives have been turned completely around by medication. But there are side effects. For instance, depending on what you're prescribed, you may suffer more weight gain."

Fanfuckingtastic.

Then: "Since I'm running a little behind schedule today, I'll have to cut your visit short. But we have just enough time to squeeze in a pap smear before you go."

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

I'm having a day.

It's a fucking cliche. I feel like I'm invisible. I feel like I'm talking and no one is listening to a goddamn word I'm saying. Or typing for that matter. It's weird. I'm sending out emails and not getting responses, I'm posting threads and entries and replies and not getting a single word of acknowledgement back. I'm calling and no one's home. No one's ever home. Especially on days like this.

I feel like as long as I'm reaching out to people, they're satisfied knowing I'm alive. No effort needs to be made to keep me that way. As long as I'm posting or calling or writing or whatever the shit I'm doing to make me feel like a functioning and contributing member of society, no matter how angry or miserable I am, there's a 'at least she's not dead' attitude about it.

I can't remember all the times I've been fed the 'if you ever need to talk, I'm there' line. The truth is no, you're not fucking 'there'. You're never fucking 'there', my friend. I'm begging you not to lie to me anymore. I'm begging you. The line cuts further and further into my chest and skull every time I hear it. My stomach starts to ache when I hear it. Hope has become such a sickness that I've just stoppped altogether. The crash that comes later will kill me one day.

Please, please keep me from hoping.

So.

Don Knotts, Darren McGavin (totally underrated actor) and Bruce Hart all died this weekend. I was never a Mr. Furley man. I always preferred Mr. Roper to Furley, but Knotts' Barney Fife was a riot. Darren McGavin's (on the offchance you don't know) most famous role was 'The Old Man' in A Christmas Story. His nonsensical Yosemite Sam-like cursing while fucking around with the furnace was the highlight of my holidays every year. And the lamp...the lamp! And Mr. Hart's 'sunny days chasing the clouds away...' I am totally bummed right now.

Anyways, it's really like a kick in the proverbial sack having all these people from my childhood dying all around me. It's really bringing me down. And I'm already there. How much lower can I get? :(

<3
ssg.x.

...vincent schiavelli died.

this sucks holiday bum. i've seen him in a billion movies, and so have you.




my birthday's coming up on sunday and i feel so fucking old and tired. this helps like a kick in the head.

<3
ssg.x.

my family is in the livingroom watching vincent price's 'theatre of blood'.

have a happy helliday.

<3
ssg.x.

...i did one of those quizzes and it turns out i'm jimmy stewart. i fucking knew it. score!



there was a moment there where i thought i'd be leslie howard...not an entirely bad thing at all!

le sigh...oh, ashley! you don't love that boring ol' melanie! you love ME!

ME!!

<3
ssg.x.

I'm afraid to look behind me because there's a massive pile of clothes on the bed for the foldin' and the weight of my stare might topple it, pinning me to the floor beneath it for all eternity.

It'd be like Pompeii except stupid.

<3
ssg.x.

boy, do i have a story to tell you when i wake up tomorrow!

in the meantime...



what's your cowboy bebop theme song?

this upsets me. my most hated of musical instruments is the saxophone. i blame it on soundtrack instrumentals in the eighties...

hrm...

<3
ssg.x.

so, with the aid of the fantastic brigidforest, the leadbelly community is up.

join join join!

i'm hoping that we can do some discussing and posting of fanart, fanfics, and bebop in general.

and i can only make it as interesting as you help me make it.

so, help?

www.livejournal.com/community/leadbellyssg

thank you, authenticpoppy, for encouraging me to do this. just the idea of it's made me happy, happy, happier than i've been in a long while.

<3
ssg.x.